


An Observer In A Hurricane

by Dikhotomia



Series: 1000 Prompts Attempt 2: The (Slightly) Unorganized Mess [7]
Category: NieR: Automata (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Existential Angst, F/F, Pre-Canon, playing with ideas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:33:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23436985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dikhotomia/pseuds/Dikhotomia
Summary: "And if he wasn't," White starts, leaping up into the bed of it and settling back among the remaining supplies. "We'll have forewarning if they drop something new on us." It's not as though we couldn't use the help, she doesn't add, leaning her sniper rifle against her shoulder.  They were all bitter, she knew, in their own ways. Bitter that they had been left behind despite the fact that they kept fighting. Bitter that they had to watch their comrades die to machines or a logic virus. Bitter that they had to watch new Androids sent from the satellite bases suffer the same abandonment they had.White has been on the front-lines for more years then she's bothered to keep track of, year after year of fighting for survival, to push back against the machines and gain even an inch of ground. Sometimes she wondered the point of it, wondered if they would ever win against an enemy that could repair itself and multiply so easily.OR.White, before she was The Commander.
Relationships: Jackass/The Commander (NieR: Automata)
Series: 1000 Prompts Attempt 2: The (Slightly) Unorganized Mess [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1594495
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	An Observer In A Hurricane

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt 17 "Lightning"
> 
> I've had this idea rolling around in my head for a while and now finally sat down to write it after reading the novels. Some characters from the novels and stage plays show up, some characters are original.

It starts as a rumor, heard from an old android with limbs that didn't work as well anymore and patchwork skin. He chatters at her absently while she unloads supplies, waving the tool in his hand at her. Jackass tells him to can it more than once as they go back and forth, crate after crate of sheet metal and machine parts. "I heard a whisper that the Human Council on the moon is up to somethin'," he says leaning towards her while she looks over his choice of wares, her eyes flicking to him when he gets close enough she can't ignore him anymore.

Her eyebrow raises before Jackass pushes in beside her and gets in the old Android's face. "Oi, no one gives a shit what they're doing upstairs," she says, and White's annoyance ratchets a little higher the more she gets accidentally jostled. "What matters is what we're doing down here-"

White less then gently pushes her aside, cutting her off and pinning her with a terse glare that keeps her retort silent. They don't have the time to bicker, White doesn't have the patience to listen. They have three other places to deliver things and a storm to beat.

"That's interesting," she says, polite, lips curled in a smile that never reaches her eyes. "Thank you for the information." 

Jackass scoffs, White ignores her.

"You know he probably was just talking out his ass to get your attention right?" Jackass comments as they cross back to the truck where Seed waits, engine idling.

"And if he wasn't," White starts, leaping up into the bed of it and settling back among the remaining supplies. "We'll have forewarning if they drop something new on us." _It's not as though we couldn't use the help_ , she doesn't add, leaning her sniper rifle against her shoulder. They were all bitter, she knew, in their own ways. Bitter that they had been left behind despite the fact that they kept fighting. Bitter that they had to watch their comrades die to machines or a logic virus. Bitter that they had to watch new Androids sent from the satellite bases suffer the same abandonment they had.

White has been on the front-lines for more years then she's bothered to keep track of, year after year of fighting for survival, to push back against the machines and gain even an inch of ground. Sometimes she wondered the point of it, wondered if they would ever win against an enemy that could repair itself and multiply so easily.

Would ever win against an enemy that evolved like they did.

"All we need to do is survive," Seed says from behind her, jerking her out of her thoughts. Slowly she turns slightly to face the older android, her confusion written plainly all over her face. "You were muttering to yourself," Seed explains as Jackass climbs into the cab beside her, grumbling under her breath. "And Jackass couldn't get your attention, we were worried for a second there." 

"Sorry," White murmurs, frowning. "I got lost in thought for a moment."

"Lost in thought is fine," Seed assures, turning away and putting the truck into gear. "It's better than the alternative." White's weight shifts as the old truck rumbles into motion, cringing at the snap-crack of the exhaust backfiring. She pushes her thoughts aside as she settles back, rifle braced across a heavier crate. Right now they need her focused, need her alert and watching for any sort of attack.

The next two deliveries go off without much problem, and White watches the storm as it rolls ever closer, lightning dancing between the clouds and arching high into the sky, splitting like shattered glass.

"An hour," she mutters, behind her Seed grunts her acknowledgement.

\------

It's the third that goes wrong, fifteen minutes off from where they had planned to shelter from the storm now bearing down on them. White climbs off the bed of the truck at the sound of Jackass' voice carrying over the wind hissing through the trees and underbrush, thunder rolling overhead and sending small animals scattering to find cover.  
She wanted to be done with this, wanted to go to their temporary home before the rain started and it became even more dangerous to be out and about then it already was.

"Careful, White," Seed calls as she makes her way into the camp. She glances, nodding slightly before dipping out of the older Android's line of sight, easing the fabric in her way up to make room to slip through. 

Jackass stands among a cluster of Androids, tempers high and voices higher. For a moment she wonders what the other Android had done, jaw clenching and a reprimand rising to the tip of her tongue, but she stills when the words reach her ears.

"He's infected, the longer you dally about it the more likely he'll kill you all!"

She notices the Android at the center of them all, held down by a larger defense model. "She's right," the defense Android states, looking up at his peers. "I can't hold him forever, we have to do something."

_Another lost_ , White thinks as she closes in, easing up to Jackass' side and resting a hand against her bicep. "Do it while he's still himself," she says, bringing collective attention to her. "So he can die as you all knew him, not as an enemy."

Around them the rain starts, first as a drizzle, then as a deluge, sheeting down and soaking all of them through quickly. White ignores the water that runs in rivulets down her face and hair, feeling it drip off her chin and her fingertips.

"P-R-A-A-Y.....G-O-D--"

Thunder roars and lightning sparks a reflection in the puddles forming on the ground. Seed emerges out of the corner of her eye, pressing in close to her side. "What's-" her expression shifts from curious to neutral, eyes lowered to the Android now chattering gibberish and thrashing around in the mud.

"You're wasting time," White states, cold, flat. "If you won't do it-" her hand lifts, pulling the revolver from her belt. "I will."

"You can't just kill him!" A woman shouts at her, held back by her peers. "There has to be some way to save him!"

"There isn't," another says, the rest of her words lost under another thunderclap. White doesn't try to read her lips, giving them the privacy they deserve.

"We can't ask you to do this, Stranger," this, from the defense model, now clearly struggling. "He's our comrade, our family. It should be us who does it."

"Sometimes it's better an outsider does it," White replies, taking aim. "Hold him still for just a moment." 

The android astride him does, gripping his head and forcing him as still as he could.

"Wait--!"

White doesn't.

The gunshot is more deafening then the thunder that preceeds it. The infected Android stills, a single hole punched through his forehead. 

"How could you--!" 

She looks up as the woman who'd been arguing against all this leaps at her, tears in her eyes and rage written all over her features. "Camilla-!" someone shouts.

"White-!"

The impact sends them both sprawling into the mud, her revolver lands just out of her reach, rifle digging hard into her spine and shoulder blade, pinned uselessly. She weathers the first blow, lifting her arm up to block the next, the third she seizes a wrist, squeezing until the android above her gasps in pain. "What will this accomplish?" She asks, pointed. "Taking your grief out on me won't bring him back."

But she'd rather it be her then someone close to her.

A stranger, not a family member.

_It all fell to her._

"You're a murderer! A monster!" Camilla struggles, thrashing against her hold before collapsing against her, sobbing onto her chest. "I loved him and--" White lays there while she cries, mud soaking into her clothes and her hair, lays there and stares up at the sky, squinting into the rain.

"Perhaps I am," she admits, voice pitched low. "But for the sake of our survival, I will do what I must."

She doesn't move as another Android comes to collect Camilla, gently lifting the sobbing woman off her and holding her close. "Thank you...White? Was it? Thank you for sparing him, for doing what we couldn't....I'm just sorry you had to because we were so unwilling."

"Was that the first one?" She asks, meeting the other's eyes. "The first one you've lost?"

"Yes," the android replies. "We knew it was only a matter of time, even though we've been trying to just hide out and live life without fighting...don't look at me like that, we knew it was foolish."

White doesn't know what expression she's wearing, but she struggles with it anyway. "It doesn't get any easier," she says, letting Jackass pull her up. "It never gets any easier, but the thing is, you have to do it anyway. Don't let them suffer."

It was better to die as yourself.

"Please, feel free to take shelter here until the storm passes."

Not like they had much of a choice, anyway.

\-----

Camilla finds the three of them later where they're all huddled around a campfire in a corner of one of the camp's blasted out buildings. Jackass is asleep against her shoulder, snoring lightly. Seed sits across from her, water cup held easily between her fingers. White looks up long before the Android speaks, seconds before she's even reached the ring of firelight that dances around them, casting them in orange shadows.

"I'd--I'd like to apologize...for earlier," she says, not bothering with the preamble of getting their attention when White has already focused in on her. "I shouldn't...have attacked you. I just-"

"You don't owe me an explanation, Camilla," White chastises gently, digging her elbow into Jackass' side and disturbing the other woman. She chooses her words carefully, mulling over each and every one before she speaks. "...What was his name?"

"Jack," Camilla replies. "His name was Jack."

"Never forget him," White says. "Live for him."

Camilla nods. "I will."

The wind howls outside, mournful in it's call.

\------

It starts as a rumor, and becomes fact a week later.

They're in the thick of it, machines keeping them pinned in the rubble of an old office building. Spindly limbs pounding on concrete between thundercrack shots of White's rifle.

Behind her Jackass builds another explosive, beside her Seed fires into the mess, machine gun chattering.

"Any day now!" Seed calls, glancing over her shoulder as White reloads and takes aim again.

"If you haven't noticed we're fucking surrounded!" Jackass shouts back, voice high and thready with a mix of panic and anger. "This has to be big enough to blast enough of 'em back so we can make a run for it." 

"And if you don't finish it soon," White retorts, ever calm even in the face of their potential death. "It won't matter." Another machine falls to her next shot, but the others still alive surge over it like ants. She fires, again, again, again, rifle bucking hard against her shoulder and her arms. "Reloading."

Seed leans over their cover as she does, firing into the crowd. 

Jackass swears, pressing in close against her back suddenly. "Behind!"

White abandons her rifle, pulling her revolver free and pivoting with the intent to hopefully kill it before it crushes their skulls, but she doesn't get the chance. An Android in black descends upon the machine, sword crushing it's body like a tin can.

The world goes silent.

"Who the fuck are you?" Jackass splutters, keeping herself between White and the new Android.

"You could say 'thank you,'" Seed drawls through her own wariness. "He did just save us." 

"Thanks, but still my last question stands," Jackass retorts, pushing back up to her feet. 

"Instructor," the android replies, eyes hidden behind a blindfold. "I'm part of a prototype unit that was recently created to help combat the machines. Project YoRHa."

White narrows her eyes, casting a glance over her shoulder, around them. There's more of them, she can see glimpses of their black uniforms through the blown windows and the overgrown vines and bushes. Hiding, in wait to see if the three of them were a danger that needed to be eliminated.

Smart, but they still had a lot of work to do. "YoRHa, hm?" She comments, glancing at the Instructor out of the corner of her eye. "This is humanities' newest response to the machine threat I take it." 

She sees his surprise in the tick of his lips. "How did you-?"

"We hear things down here," she says, fingers twitching against the handle of her revolver. "People talk. Now tell your friends they can come out of hiding."

Whispers erupt, some startled, some accusatory. 

"If you think you're going to sneak up on a sniper you're still a few hundred years off," she adds, turning her attention. "I can see every single one of you." But they're new, despite the training they likely received up on the bases, this was likely their first ground operation. 

"You really are as impressive as they said, White, is it?"

Her gaze drifts back to the Instructor, eyebrow climbing slowly to her hairline. "I beg your pardon?"

"Project YoRHa is the next big thing," he says, tilting his head. "And they've been keeping an eye on you in particular for it. Your skill set would be useful for a Command position. You're incredibly efficient and a natural leader, and you have an eye for strategy. Despite overwhelming odds you always come out the other end alive. We need you, White."

Jackass blusters, lurching forward. "The hell? You don't get to just show up here and-" White silences her with an arm across her chest, pushing her back as she rises up to her feet.

"I wasn't 'needed' when my unit was left planet-side with no way to return. I wasn't 'needed' for more years then I can count and now all of a sudden you want me to come back and play leader for a bunch of units I know nothing about?" She's angry, but she keeps it held behind the edges of her teeth, swallows it down like smoke.

"You want my skill set," she adds, tilting her chin up. "But you need a damn good reason to convince me to come back."

The Instructor nods. "Let me show you."

"This had better be good," White replies, cold. "Because if it isn't you can go back to your base and tell them to find someone else."

The Android smiles.

She doesn't like him.

(She doesn't have to.)

\-------

Storms in the desert are different from storms anywhere else, wind whipping unbidden across the sand and stirring it all up into a cloud that's impossible to see through let alone navigate. Yet here they were, the three of them and the new units, slowly making their way through. "I hate this," Jackass sputters beside her, arm held up to ward off the sand. "Why are we even humoring them? You shoulda sent them packing."

"I'm curious," White replies, face tucked into the scarf tied around her neck. Eyes squinted against the razor sharp grains still battering her synthetic skin. In hindsight she knows this is easier for them to navigate compared to a human, their chassis built to withstand the elements and considerably more punishment then the flesh and blood and bone of their creators.

But she still didn't like it.

"You can't be serious," Jackass says, pulling her attention back to her. "You're not thinking of actually doing it are you? What if it's some kind of trap and they're planning to kill you or something."

"Don't be so paranoid," White scolds, glancing at her. "If they wanted me dead, they wouldn't have saved us from the machines."

Jackass huffs, then shoves in against her side, tangling their fingers together. "Whatever, I still don't like it."

_I don't want you to go._

"Agh shit I have sand in my mouth and all in my boots!"

"Then stop talking, Jackass."

She doesn't, but White tunes her out with a smile the other woman can't see.

\-----

She gives The Instructor and his YoRHa a chance to prove themselves, perched high on a half sunk building with Seed and Jackass aside her, observing as the units below fight the machines. One after another.

And she's not sure how she feels, because she can see things she's unsure the others notice. The instability in one, the hesitation in another. They're intelligent, and they're deadly, but it reminds her of one of Jackass' bombs, something ticking down until a detonation.

Something large and messy.

"If you decide to go," Seed says suddenly, resting a hand on her shoulder. "I'll follow you."

White glances at her, tilting her head up to see her face. "You don't have to."

"I know, but I'm making this choice. What about you, Jackass?"

"Fuck that," the other woman spits, kicking a small slab of concrete off the edge. "I'm staying down here. I'll find another resistance cell to join up with. But know I don't fuckin like this."

White hums low in her throat, easing up to her feet. "You don't have to."

But the ache doesn't subside, only worsens as she agrees to join the Instructor and their new project. Worsens as she shares one last private moment with Jackass before they depart, a hard kiss and forceful promises.

Seed keeps to her word.

"Welcome to The Bunker, Commander White."

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/modulatechaos), though it's mostly me yelling about Fire Emblem: Three Houses


End file.
